Needles & Grooves

Anti freeze

For real though, cursory interweb search: "Most animals, including skunks, dislike the smell of citrus fruits. Place orange or lemon peels around the yard as a natural skunk repellent.
Predator urine (dogs, coyotes) can be used to repel a skunk."

Yeah, it seems I need to purchase some urine.

If you're not regularly pissing in your own lot lines do you even own your property?

@ranbalam you immediately ignored the "just put some lemon and orange peels or even just spray some lemon juice" thing to "PISS ON IT"

Dave chapel's R Kelly impression would be proud

I got a piss guy, let me know and he'll have some fresh urethra juice on your doorstep in 2 hours

All this piss talk...anti freeze is starting to look better and better, huh?

“I got a piss guy”

I bet a couple of skunks are in your yard laughing it up right now. "Hey, that hooman has a crazy look in his eyes. You think he's gonna try the piss?" "Looks that way. I bet he's got someone right now hooking him up with their 'piss guy'." "He does know we spray? Smells are kind of our thing." "Yea but he looks so cute. Let him have this dream."

Cayan pepper supposedly too, but I'm really not sure how effective that would be

They aren't dangerous and he isn't going to spray you unless they feel attacked. They eat things that you don't want around anyway. I'd let him chill he will move on eventually

@TheThinWhiteDuke I have co-existed with the family of groundhogs that live in the back corner of my yard for the 20 years I’ve been here. They dug holes and really messed up my old tool shed, but I still remained passive. This is way more alarming, I really wasn’t comfortable on my patio with that dude just 20 yards away. I’d rather scare him off asap if possible.

Broom, duct tape, kitchen knife.
Once the deed is done , I’ll tell you were to remove the stink gland and send over a nice Cajun recipe.