Alternate, break in, change half his lightbulbs to 5 watt. The other half to 200 watt. Cut holes in the toes of half his socks. Replace his toothpaste with face cream. Replace his shoes with ones 2 sizes smaller.
And then glue his volume control to 1 db and take the remote.
And then glue his volume control to 1 db and take the remote.
In all seriousness, are there not any city by-laws against unreasonable noise?